Real Life, Real Love, Real Hard

The article I wrote in this space last October called us to be real with each other in the church. I mentioned the need to be honest with ourselves and one another about our strengths and our weaknesses. I continue to feel that this is critical to our efforts to make our church a welcoming place, a community of healing and hope.

At a recent meeting of Small Group leaders here at Marion, the lyrics of the song “Stained Glass Masquerade” by Casting Crowns were shared with the group. I found them to be powerful and probably pretty accurate of how many people feel in churches on Sunday mornings.

Here is an excerpt:

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they'll soon discover
That I don't belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation's open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

 

What is your first reaction to these lyrics? 

Maybe you feel sad that someone could feel this way, as if they are the only one who has problems.

Maybe you can totally relate to the feelings expressed.

Maybe you are drawn to ask, as I am, how we can make sure our congregation is a safe place, a place of acceptance and healing for those who are tired of wearing a mask.

All of these are valid reactions and I hope we can move beyond simply acknowledging that this masquerade is too often truly the case in our churches, and begin to make changes in the way we relate to one another to allow struggling persons to feel truly loved and embraced.

What can we do to embrace those who feel as if they are the only ones who are imperfect? Show them real love. What is real love?  I think the Bible is clear that the only true love, the only Godly love, is self-sacrificing love. This is the love that we see exhibited in Jesus’ life and death, and this is the love God calls his followers to express to others, so that the world may know the love of God.

Real love in real life is real hard.  There’s no getting around the fact that this is not always easy to do. It’s rarely easy. In fact, if it’s easy, it’s likely not real love. If it is something we find we can do on our own strength, it’s not real love.

In order to really love, we need God’s strength. In order to show God, we need God. But if there’s one thing that I’m even more convinced of than the difficulty of real love, it’s the fact that it’s worth it.  As we begin to experience the freedom and joy that comes from honest, open relationships, with God and with others, we’ll wonder why we believed for so long that hiding behind a mask is the best way to live.

May we experience real life in our congregation, and may we be filled with real love.

Pastor Carl